Dude Kills Wife During Bad Dream Blamed On Cough Sizzurp

A North Carolina man is using the bad dream defense — telling a 911 operator he awoke from slumber to find his wife stabbed to death and drenched in blood, reports said. Matthew Phelps, 28, told the operator in Raleigh early Friday that he fell asleep after taking too much cold medicine and may have... Read More

Incredible Opening Of Let It Roll 2017

I haven't been yet but it's on my fucket list for sure. A festival devoted to just Drum and Bass. The openings of Let It Roll are always amazing and give me shivers. It's been going for 10 years now and usually in the Czech Republic. Perhaps next year I will make it out there! Read More

Chick Cuts Off Dudes Johnson And Flushes It Down Turlet For Golfing Too Much

A wife cut off her violent husband’s penis as he slept, because he was spending too much time playing golf, it is alleged. Neighbours in the city of Yeosu, in South Korea, heard loud groaning as the 54-year-old was in pain. The woman is claimed to have flushed the organ down the toilet. When a neighbour... Read More

Lyft Expands To 32 New States As It Tries To Crush Uber

Lyft is driving into the countryside in an effort to raise ridership and steal market share from rival Uber. The much smaller Lyft announced Thursday that it is offering service to passengers in every corner of 32 U.S. states, including hard-to-reach rural areas. The move boosts the number of states with full coverage to 40.... Read More

Places Not To Rob If You Are A Dumbfuck

Two men were arrested after cops say they robbed a bar outside Baltimore while off-duty officers were there for a police retirement party. The Baltimore Sun reports the masked men allegedly demanded cash from the register at a Woodlawn bar, Monaghan’s, Tuesday evening while a group of officers gathered for a longtime sergeant’s retirement. Monaghan’s owner... Read More

2 Cats In 1?

This kitty looks like it has a fat cat on its back. Genius! -Totes

Drug Smuggling 101: Meth Inside Dick Candles Doesn’t Work

A crew of drug smugglers was busted Wednesday for attempting to use penis-shaped candles to bring crystal meth into the city, sources said. The group of five suspects was arrested after being caught storing 1,300 pounds of candles stuffed with the drugs in a Paterson, NJ warehouse, according to sources. While some candles were phallic-shaped,... Read More

Chick In Houston Shelter Nails Stupid Ass CNN Reporter

I love how Danielle (probably spelled Dan-Yell) nails the stupid ass CNN fake news reporter! Thx for the link Spack! -Totes

Who Dunnit? Abby or Tobby? Someone Fucked That Mattress Up!

Even if you haven’t committed the crime, it isn’t always easy to look innocent. When pet owner Jennifer Kinderman, 23, from Canutillo, Texas, returned home to find a dog mattress had been spectacularly ripped apart and then strewn across her living room, there was an obvious prime suspect. While one of her fiance’s dogs, Abby,... Read More

Dude Reveals On Video That The Salvation Army Kills Everyone

The salvation army was killing everyone? I knew them fucks were up to no good. I love when reporters are put on the spot and have to think quickly. -Totes

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